Have you ever felt like screaming to the top of your lungs? That’s pretty much how introvert moms feel about 80% of the time. 😂 As an introvert mom, I’ve had to learn a thing or two to keep myself sane while parenting. Here are a few introvert mom hacks I hope will help you, too.
Understanding Introvert Moms
Introverts are people who prefer low stimulation environments and need quiet, alone time to recharge their energy. There are different types of introverts, but these key things remain true for all of them.
Introvert moms are no different. They need quiet, alone time to recharge, even more so because the parenting demand on their social and mental energy is very high. This is especially true for a stay-at-home mom.
The biggest challenge for quiet moms is finding opportunities to get this when taking care of tiny humans who need so much from you.
This is something I’m deeply familiar with as an introvert mom of four. So, I hope these few introvert mom hacks I’ve learned will help you, or an introvert mom you know.
Introvert Mom Hacks for Parenting
Create quiet activities.
We live in a loud world, so naturally, people tend to think kids need loud activities to be entertained. Firstly, embrace the fact that it is not your job as a mom to keep your children entertained every minute.
That said, having a few quiet options for independent play available for them will keep them from complaining of boredom every two minutes. Have age-appropriate activities prepared in containers, baggies, or boxes.
Then calmly direct them to those activities and an appropriate place to do them. Examples of some quiet activities I use for my small children are Play-Doh or kinetic sand, building blocks or magnatiles, coloring-drawing-writing, and dressup.
Older kids should be able to figure this out for themselves. If they’re having a hard time, just let them know how much of your to-do list they could help with. I’m sure that will spark some creativity in them.
Say no without guilt.
There is an insane amount of activities and pressure to attend those activities. We recently ended up in an intense birthday party rotation.
On the one hand, I’m glad my girls have friends and they have opportunities to have fun with them. They enjoy social activities more than Mom. On the other hand, this much social interaction can quickly get overwhelming.
My tip is that sometimes you just have to say no. It’s worth it to give yourself breathing room and time to recoup on the weekends versus hopping from party to party or multiple play dates.
Set boundaries.
Related to saying no, remember to set healthy boundaries. If you’ve decided that your family is having an easy weekend at home, don’t feel you have to change that to accommodate others. Teach this to family and close friends, too.
It’s as simple as saying we won’t be available until after 12 pm on Saturday, or I can’t talk right now because the kids are napping and I want that time to myself.
Declutter and get organized.
There are huge benefits for introverts to declutter and keep their space organized. That’s why I write a whole section of articles about it on this blog. I know this can be difficult with kids, but do try, Wallflower.
I can’t tell you how happy it makes me feel to walk into the kitchen and see a clean and clear counter. It’s a subtle dopamine hit to my brain. The opposite is true when I walk into the kitchen, and the counter is a mess. It’s a slightly more stressful way to start my day.
Why? Visual clutter adds to your stress and drains your very precious and finite energy. Even when you do have a moment of peace and quiet, looking at the clutter around you steals from that peace just a little. And an introverted parent needs all they can get.
Pad your timing for travel and activities.
This one is simple but can be a game-changer. Give yourself plenty of time for travel and transitions. For example, if you need to get out of the house by a certain time, back that up by at least 30 minutes. Up to an hour wouldn’t be bad either.
Padding your time for introvert moms can mean the difference between getting there frazzled and annoyed or getting there with low stress and a happy family.
It gives you more room to adjust when someone has a meltdown or needs to go potty right after you’ve strapped them in. Yes, this sometimes happens even when I make them go and do a diaper check beforehand. 🙄
One of the most important introvert mom hacks, and the best life hacks in general, is to prioritize your self-care. Here are a few tips on how to do that.
Introvert Mom Hacks for Self-Care
Get alone time when you can.
Wallflower, you need alone time to recharge. This is not a luxury! I’ve seen the consequences of treating it as such. #introvertmeltdown
So, don’t neglect your self-care. Get alone time when you can so you can continue to stay well, and show up for your family the way you want.
That might mean waking up early before everyone else. Like I’m doing right now as I write this. 😊 Early mornings have been such a blessing for me.
For you, it could just mean waking up 30 minutes before everyone else so you can quietly enjoy your coffee without a lot of noise and distraction.
If you’re not a morning person, staying up later (as in after your kids are in bed) works just the same. Many introverts find nighttime to be productive for similar reasons.
And if you’re not a morning person or a night owl, try capitalizing on naps and meal times. These times are small treasures for an introverted mama.
Get creative with how you recharge.
Recharging may need to look a little different when you’ve got kids running around. Although being alone with quiet is ideal, some days you just can’t get that. So, you have to be creative.
Think of different ways you can recharge so you’re prepared when you do have a few minutes. Try doing mindfulness-type activities that can be done with them around or, even better, that they can help with.
Some examples could be sorting toys, folding clothes, or taking a walk. Sometimes a good cup of tea on my porch is enough to get me through the afternoon.
You can even break out some of those independent activities ☝🏽 while you take five minutes to pray or meditate.
Pro tip: don’t always leave it until the end of the day. You may not end up with much time before you need to get yourself to bed. And sleeping is not the same as resting or recharging.
Don’t lose yourself.
Another one of the best mom hacks is to not lose yourself to it. You were a whole person before you had kids, and you still are.
Motherhood can be consuming! So much so that many women lose who they are in it. Don’t do this, Wallflower!
There’s a better way. The most true mom hacks for you are those that involve being yourself!
It’s good for your kids to see that you have your own personality outside of being their mom. So if you have hobbies or other interests you enjoy doing, keep doing them.
You may have to do them in a more limited fashion, but make time for it when you can. This is a great way to have more balance as a parent.
Build a support network.
I am a believer in the old adage “It takes a village …” Be intentional about building your village, especially if you are a single mother. Who’s in your village? That’s up to you. It can be a husband and family members, or your besties.
Unfortunately, we don’t live near my family, so my church family became my village. And they’ve been invaluable to me.
Additionally, I know they’re cliche, but don’t discount mom groups. I avoided them until recently, but surprisingly, I’ve enjoyed the support and resource sharing.
Your village should know and respect your needs as an introvert. So when you call and say I’m drained and I need a break, you can count on their support to give you that.
Do one thing for yourself every day.
What is something that is just for you? Is it a desert you hide from the kids, prayer, meditation, journaling, running? If you don’t know, then find one.
It’s important to your mental health and balance to look back at your day and not feel like it was all spent doing things for other people.
And, no, this isn’t selfish. It’s sanity.
Closing Thoughts
It’s not easy being an introvert mom. I think the introvert struggles are amplified when you’re a parent. You have to be really intentional about getting what you need so you can be the best mom you can. And not go crazy in the process.
Use these introvert mom hacks to make sure you have balance and space to recharge, and don’t lose yourself to motherhood.
And know that you are not alone. If you want weekly support on living life as an introvert, sign up for my weekly newsletter – Introvert Petals.
